The Hellfire of an Arc
by therealwisewolf
Summary: Alright then this was a reupload of my last story which was deleted for a very weird reason but anyway you know the drill. Jaune wasn't saved in time by Pyrhha he meets a giant wolf and a omnipotent being who decided to send him back for their own amusement along with the powers of Scorpion. Also they sent him back because he wants a "sexy kitty girlfriend".
1. Why the Hell are you Dead!

**So yeah I mainly wanted to laugh so I made this piece of work to see if I can create something that isn't dark and who knows maybe I'll make people who reads this laugh so yeah I don't own RWBY it belongs to the late Monty Oum and Rooster Teeth. By the way I may try to include some 4th wall breaks here and there but who knows okay then on with the story. Also may become mature but who knows. Also this will have a minor Mortal Kombat element to it.**

(Someone's POV what oh okay um sorry Jaune's POV but only temporarily)

"Well my life couldn't be any worse" said no one ever seriously our "Headmaster's" idea of initiation involves catapulting us off the cliff "Now then are there any questions?" the asshat finally asked "Um yes sir" "Anyone at all" I'm right in front of him how come he is deliberately ignoring me "Yes you there" "Uhhh finallly sir ma-" "I'm sorry but I wasn't talking to you I was talking to that person right there." "Yeah Headmaster what was the name of the song you use for you ringtone" "I have no idea what you are talking about" "You know it goes like dundundundun dundundundun dundundundundudndundudndun" he was humming Sandstorm by Darude how could he not know that, it's my favourite song. (It's not mine) hey shut up narrator who couldn't be bothered to actually listen to it. Anyway what was I saying (you weren't saying anything in fact it is Ozpin who was about to say something) oh right. "I can't believe that it became a meme anyway anyone else?" "Yeah Headmaster" "I'm just going on a limb to say that no one else has any questions to ask anyway launch them"

(No longer Jaune's POV)

Jaune was launched last with his last words being "What the absolute Fuuuuuucccckkkkkk" "Headmaster Ozpin are you sure it is wise to launch students into a Grimm-Infested Forest?" Asked his sexy assistant who's name you shouldn't Google in the workplace, "Glynda trust me what's the worst that could happen" now back to Jaune as a spear nearly impaled him "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-" well he's dead "_Hmmmmm what you saaaaay, Hmmmmm that you only meant weeeeeellllll_" "Oh hang Headmaster it's my scroll." Glynda got her scroll out of god knows where since I'm not going to bother describing where it is so yeah.

(Cut to who the fuck knows where)

_Well at least I'm alive_ thought Jaune only to be greeted by a giant ass wolf and another human. Jaune was about to shit his pants by looking at this wolf until the wolf said this "Well shit you aren't supposed to be dead" "Ummm who the fuck are you?" questioned Jaune "Oh yeah well I'm the author of this story that you are in" "So your Oum" "No I'm not Oum this guy next to me is Oum" "So yeah listen you aren't supposed to be dead at least not yet anyways" "So yeah let me just ask Why the Hell am I Dead?!" "Well you can kinda blame it on your "headmaster" for launching your ass off the cliff so um yeah that's it" Jaune groveled at the giant wolf begging to be sent back to life "please please oh please send me back I'll do anything I'll suck your-" "Okay there calm down listen I'm going to send you back anyways because if I don't then this little thing I want a laugh at ends too soon" "That and I will kick your ass." "Oh yeah plus Oum is going to kick my ass and he is not joking when he says that" "So yeah we're going to send you back for two reasons One life here is boring and we need to watch shit get fucked up for the sake of humour and Two I know you want a sexy kitty girlfriend don't you?" "I have no idea what you are talking about" "Oh come on you had porn mags underneath your bed to be specific faunus porn mags well to be even more specific cat faunus porn mags."

Jaune tried to defend himself "Could you blame me I mean come on what isn't sexy about licking milk out of the bowl" "Right Oum would you mind explaining to him what's about to happen to him while I'll try to find Scorps?" The omnipotent being known only as Oum nodded his head "Right thanks" the giant ass wolf walked off to who knows where while Oum explained to Jaune "So listen as you know despite being gods in this place it gets dull seeing chaos in one place and peace in another so we need someone to fuck shit up in order to be amused." "Okay now you are going to be powerful like powerful on this world's terms though you might want to show caution okay and if you think your fine trust me your not so yeah that's it." "Now do you have any questions" "Yeah um what's the name of this kitty girlfriend that he talked about?" "Oh yeah it's Blake Belladonna and this is what she will look like she has a bow on" then the wolf came back carrying someone by his teeth he then dropped him off right in front of the two. "Right Jaune meet Scorpion he is going to merge with you because A we don't want to be a weak ass bitch okay and B we don't usually see you get easily pissed at every single thing for the purpose of shits and gigs" "I still protest to this" "Shut up Scorps your not seen in a lot of fanfics so be glad that your in one."

Scorpion grumbled as he shook off the dust on his armour "So this is the kid you want me to merge with" "Yeah why you got a problem with it" "No I thought you were going to give me someone arrogant." "Ha I don't hate you that much Scorps so yeah Oum begin the merging" Oum nodded as he began to say some words "merge goddammit I'm saying a bunch of gibberish to make it seem like I am actually doing something otherwise you dopes wouldn't believe me" strangely enough it was only the wolf that didn't know what he was actually saying "Rubber dicks and now let these two merge into an pissed off being." "Hey Scorpion is too late to back out of it" "Yes it is too late" "Now will these two go back and wreak havoc for we are in desperate need of entertainment and the author is just writing a bunch of lines to lengthen this thing to prove he is not lazy" (**Hey come on man I'm trying**) fuck finally these two begin to merge with the sound of a thousand assholes accompanying them as they scream in eternal suffering. (By the way Jaune's armour is the cover picture of the story)

(Still don't know where because author too lazy to actually bother *punch* okay Emerald Forest just mere hours *another punch and a slap with baloney* okay 10 minutes after Jaune landed on his neck)

"Uhhhhhh"

(Switch to Jaune's POV for no reason whatsoever)

When I opened my eyes all I saw was black until I realised it was hair and I blinked a couple times to see.

(Out of Jaune's POV)

The newly revived being's heart did a back-flip as he realised that the person in front of him was "sexy kitty girlfriend" "Hey you okay cause you kinda landed on your neck" "..." "It's my kitty!" Blake was dumbfounded at this person first he broke his neck then for some reason came back to life only for this man to call her his kitty "What the fuck happened to you?"

**And end oh boy sorry if it didn't seemed funny towards the end but I promise that it will be ridiculous next time with Blake trying to escape our revived nut job. Okay I'm going to talk about something real quick some of you who are reading this actually already read this but listen the one I made on here was deleted for a really stupid until next time bye bye.**


	2. Someone Help MEEEEEEE!

Yeah so this is going to be continued why because we have yet to get to Jaune getting easily pissed off at everything. So yeah I will get another chapter of The Arc of The VSA up nonetheless I'm still alive and I need entertainment. Anyway time for Jaune to get pissed off when Grimm come by to interrupt time with his kitty. Regarding when Jaune is angry will his set on fire or will his skull be like Scorpion's fire breath attack and for that I say both that is why the mask will be important.

(Fuck knows where I mean Emerald Forest)

Blake was currently trying (keyword trying) to escape she didn't know what to make of the situation first this psycho landed on his neck next thing she knows he's holding her while rubbing her ears. That's not to say the she didn't enjoy it the purrs coming from her clearly said all (Meanwhile with a wolf and a god "Ha young love at it's finest" "I know Oum I know" the two were relaxing on recliners eating popcorn.) "Please *purr* stop" Blake successfully removed his hands to ask him wait what was she going to ask him again hey Oum can you help?(Back to the two beings "Oh okay that was she's going to ask him alright") "Okay please don't touch my ears who are you and how do you know I'm a faunus" "To the first I'm Jaune Arc and to the second Oum told me." You could see the look on her face that told she didn't believe him "Okay I guess were partners but seriously why did you call me your kitty" (Inside Jaune's mind "Ummm shit what do I say what do I say quick narrator help" (I'm not sure I can help man, you're on your own) "what why" (Because fuck you that's why) "Your no help (hey you try writing love then you can come talk to me) "Ah ha I got it I will tell her" we exit Jaune's dirty mind.) "Are you listening to me" "Ummm because your adorable" Jaune tried his best not to look weird even though no one survives breaking their neck.

A sigh come from Blake's mouth as she could admit that while yes he was definitely crazy and she was partnered with him needless to say either way she could've done worse right? (I don't know about that I'm mean you were friends with benefits with a terrorist and I mean Whats-His-Fuck) first of all his name is Adam and second of all aren't you on my side (I don't know about that but I'm trying my hardest to limit my interactions with characters because while it is funny I got a story to narrate.) Another sigh escaped her lips at the narrator's laziness (hey fuck you) "Anyway we need to find the temple" the resurrected man reluctantly got up "Hey Blake after this do you want to go somewhere?" "I don't know what do you have in mind even though this is not what a normal conversation would go like" (Hey I'm trying okay) "Well there's this great bar and grill place they roast the shit out of tuna-" "Did you say tuna?" Blake stopped in her steps when she heard that "Is that a yes" "okay I will go out with you but onl-" she was cut off by a bunch of dicks otherwise known as the Grimm "Okay we will continue this later but we Jaune, are you okay?" Blake asked him slowing backing away from the being who's eyes just lit on fire for no reason "You fucking pieces of shit you interrupted time with my KITTTTTTYY!"

(Cut to the headmaster and his assistant because reasons that's why)

"Okay now then and fixed" Ozpin was trying his very best to change his ringtone from Sandstorm to something else "Come on Glynda call it now" "Okay Headmaster" the scroll ringed a few times before the song came on and it was still Sandstorm. (Inside Ozpin's mind "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" (Yeah that's a no) "Oh shut up narrator and fuck you too for not changing it" (no fuck you buddy) "My life is meaningless I can't stop Salem without her laughing when someone calls me" (Yeah thats on you) out of fuckface's mind.) "Headmaster are you alright" Glynda asked her headmaster even though she's know how he felt about his ringtone still being the same. _Beside it's catchy _she thought "Glynda how are the students doing" "Good why do you as-" "Because I realise it's hopeless to try and change it because the narrator doesn't want it to change." "Right huh that is strange" "What is it Glynda" "One of the cameras went offline" "Where was the camera located?" "Where that Arc boy who landed on his neck is" *BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM* The two observed a large amount of the forest getting instantly burned as a giant mushroom cloud seemed to float right above the epicentre.

"Glyn" the headmaster asked using her nickname which was rare "Yes Ozpin" "Where did we put the stash of Qrow's confiscated drinks again" "It is underneath the cupboard next to your coffee machine" Glynda turned around to see Ozpin just walking away "Would you like a drink?" He asked her stopping "I need to watch the students" "Fuck them I'm not dealing with this shit right now we don't get paid enough for this" Glynda had two options one watch the students or two drink and get smashed (Yeah you know which one she's going for) "Wait up headmaster I need to make sure you don't challenge Port to a fight."

(Back to Emerald Forest or what used to be Emerald Forest)

Blake once again didn't know what to think of the mess she was caught up in first Grimm appeared as she was getting ready to fight them Jaune for some reason immediately did a 180 she could've sworn that a few of the Grimm looked like they shat their metaphorical pants. Next thing she knows the entire area around her and as she observed probably more was consumed in flames and right now she watching Jaune beating up the Grimm and throwing them over and over again (Look up Hulk throws Loki around and you will know what I am talking about) and she thought she heard a Grimm say and I quote "Please help MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Right now it looks like Jaune calmed down a bit currently he's holding a Beowulf's head that looks like it saw the face of death if they believe in such a thing "That is what you get for interrupting my time with my kitty you piece of shits" he then lifted up his mask and when she though she was going to see a face she saw a skull on fire shit you not his skull was on fire and he let loose a stream of flames. The skull disappeared and his face regrew on him and she had to admit he was handsome (back to the two beings "You know Wolf I wonder will you force someone to make him angry on purpose just for our amusement" "Oum if you know me I most certainly will" Oum couldn't argue against that, they continued eating their popcorn with some bits and pieces of it lying about after they watched Glynda and Ozpin reactions) "Right what were you going to say about the bar and grill place?" Blake decided it was best not to question why his skull was on fire he placed on his mask "Yeah I said oh shit narrator what was I going to say (Um fuck if I know I just narrate the story but I could ask) "So you talk to the narrator too" Jaune asked her "Yeah he's an ass" "I know right he's never gonna help you even when you need it" (Okay I'm back alright Blake here is what you are going to say) "Yeah I said I will go out with you but you must not pet my ears while in public."

(By the way since the author couldn't be bothered to *punch to the face* ow okay um yeah alright she put her bow back on)

"Alright then Blake but can I still call you kitty" "No" (Yeah no fuck your decision he's still gonna call you that) "Blake where are we supposed to go again?" "We're suppose to go to the temple to find the pieces" Jaune followed right behind her as she began making her way to the temple being sure to look at the sky while doing it. (bowchikabowwow) (Timeskip because apparently the author of this story can't be bothered worth a shit to actually divert the perspective to anybody else *punch to the stomach* ow where the fuck did that come from) Right so the two arrived at the temple to see a chick with blond hair and big (what *author talks to him*oh okay um sorry I can't actually say it without possibly getting rated M so Monty Python take it away) tracts of land and another one with red hair wearing gladiator like armour. "Yeesh Pyrrha why are you so down" "It's just that I feel like I failed him" "Who your dad or your boyfriend" "He's not my boyfriend I think that he didn't survive his fall" "Wow talking about _falling_ in love eh." While Pyrrha didn't appreciate the pun Jaune who arrived with Blake started laughing his ass off "Oh my god that pun was so good" "Hey no way someone who finally likes my puns" "Jaune Arc nice to meet you" "Yang Xiao Long" Wow I think I like _Yanging _out with you" "Oh *laughing* I don't think you know_ Xiao Long _I waited for someone to be as cool with puns as you." (Meanwhile Ruby with her partner Weiss while they are hanging on a Nevermore for dear life sneezed as if a thousand voices screamed out in horror as if a unholy combination has just been made and we will all suffer their horrible, terrible, puns then she opened her eyes to see that she was no longer hanging on to the Nevermore she looked like a cartoon character who was running on a cliff only to realise they're not on the cliff anymore and they defy gravity for a few seconds for comedic effect and holy hatred this is a mouthful hey author are you just making this up as you go *two punches to the stomach and five slaps of baloney* ooooowwwwwwww okay okay yeah you get the point now she is falling.)

"HHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP" yelled Ruby as she was falling so fast that somehow the characters have enough time to react to it and speed into or rather sloth into action "Oh no Ruby hey narrator use your narrating powers to make her fall on a mattress (yeah I'm gonna say no to that Yang but hey to prove I'm not an asshole I will make her slow down a bit so Jaune can save her in time) okay not what I asked but hey guys lets not look at the _roses._" (Uh I can feel my essence drain when I narrate these bad puns) "Don't worry Yang I'll save her" Jaune manages to summon up enough energy to jump high to be able to meet her as she's falling. "I got you Ruby" "Oh hey wait who are you" "It's me Jaune" "um Jaune you know your defying gravity right" Jaune looked down to see that the two stopped moving and now there falling but luckily he had his trusty spear to help (too bad he can't say "Get over here!) "Come here" (ah nevermind he can just say that, because reasons that's why) the two managed to land on the branch and Jaune dropped Ruby from the bridal carry he had her in for about (fuck I don't know like two minutes) anyway the two managed to get back down on the ground. "Wait where's Weiss" "Who's Weiss" "You were hitting on her earlier before the initiation how could you forget that" "Um I was distracted by Yang's amazing puns" "I wouldn't say they're amazing." If Jaune wasn't already a walking corpse he would be dead by the words that Ruby just said (wait why would he be dead from that what *talks with the author* oh okay um apparently he would die from shock) "How dare you" he said "Um Jaune are you alright?" Ruby looked a bit scared by Jaune but then again who wouldn't be afraid if the person (who is standing right next to you) he's calm at first then suddenly his eyes just burst into flames "Uh oh" said Blake seeing his eyes light on fire "I will make you pay for the disrespect."

(Meanwhile Ruby is having Vietnam Flashbacks why because your never too young to have Vietnam Flashbacks you don't even need to know what Vietnam Flashbacks are and you will still have them) "Uh Jaune would you like to pet your kitty?" Blake didn't need to take off her bow to calm him down (wow you just want this story to not be rated M don't you *sarcasm detected deploying baloney* okay okay I'm sorry I don't wanna get slapped again) the fire in Jaune's eyes immediately vanished with those words and suddenly if it weren't for the mask you would see the most happiest smile one has ever saw. (Um shit the author is currently stumped right now just give him a few) "Wait can I" he asked (wow it took you long enough for- *author is currently holding a piece of baloney in his paw* I mean good work) "No Jaune" while he was sadden at the fact he couldn't pet her the good thing is that Ruby wasn't about to learn "how to break your neck 101." Ruby ran to her sister embracing her in a hug (not that kind of hug) "Woah Ruby nice to see you" "Yang I was so scared for a second I thought I was going to die" then all a sudden a very loud (and bitchy) voice cut through the air "Why did you leave me" Ruby suddenly remembered that Weiss was still hanging on to the Nevermore. "Oh no Weiss quick ju-" five trees went down right next to Jaune and cue Ren and Nora (who I practically forgot about up to this moment) Nora was riding a Ursa (not in that way) the Ursa had finally reached his limits and died (like my fear of baloney *author holds up a piece of baloney* nevermind still scared) "Awwww it died" the bubbly girl said disappointed that it didn't last longer (That's what she said.)

Ren finally caught up with her he was breathing hoarsely as if he ran up 25 flights of stairs (fatty) "Dammit Nora I thought I told you wait for me your lucky that I managed to keep track of you and the only reason I did was because the narrator said I had to (yeah cause you need exercise)" Ren looked up only to see that Nora had fucking teleported. (Wow is she the female version of the Flash except not as fast as him) "Ohhhhhh" oh god here we go Nora looked at the golden (what ever the fuck I don't know chess okay just cut me some slack) yeah let's just call it the golden sandwich she put it on top of her head and said "I'm queen of the castle I'm queen of the cas-" "NORA!" (Back to Wolf and Oum "Hey Wolf" "Yeah" "Why did you list that Jaune will get pissed at Nora's antics" "Okay Oum let me put this into perspective for you, you have a short fuse temper nearly every single thing will make you angry no matter how small and foolhardy it is, a fucking pie to the face will make you beat the person black and blue." "Now tell me when your teammate is constantly doing stupid shit and sometimes it doesn't end well for you most of the time, would you not get pissed eventually when she doesn't seem to stop" "Okay but still at least put like a threshold or something" "Oum I said that Jaune will be pissed at every single thing no matter how small of course I'm not going to make him somewhat tolerant of her actions, that's not to say that I'm going to make her stop she will like try to avoid pissing him off so he may ignore somethings when it doesn't involve him either directly or indirectly." "So we have a deal Oum" "Yes Wolf we have a deal but you can make her sometimes piss Jaune off intentionally" alright then the two got more bags of popcorn and continued watching.)

Nora instantly teleported to Ren's side (right so now that we cleared those two for introducing to the story now we can get back to Jaune as he is being convinced keyword being convinced by Ruby to do the same thing again for Weiss.) "Please Jaune" "No I thought I made it clear I'm not going to save her" "We literally just began talking about this" "I will not jump to catch her." Blake interrupted the two to say "Um guys she is currently falling" "Well I'm not going to catch her (unfortunately Jaune you don't have a choice in the manner) oh come on narrator (sorry dude wait nevermind I'm not sorry) uh fine Ruby I will catch her." (Hello it's me the author of this story I am not going to bother writing what is about to happen but I will tell you she is ungrateful when he catches her, and before any of you say I'm hating on Weiss let me tell you that is not true I don't hate her in fact I think she is a well written character evolving from a sassy bitch to a sort of down-to-earth person aware of the reality outside of Atlas so yeah I don't hate her but yeah back to the story.) Jaune grumbles under his breath "ungrateful bitch" Blake had grabbed the second golden sandwich why cause (oh shit I completely forgot what I was going to say but um I'm pretty sure that it was going to be about the author you know fuck it back to narrating the long ass chapter.) Then all the sudden a fucking Deathstalker who just couldn't help himself and thought hey time to be an asshole and fuck up the main cast (well I say to you Mr. Deathstalker get Chucked Mr. Fuckle oh wait um) "Oh you got a be kidding me really you fucking piece of shit scorpion you just have to piss me off I will rip your fucking stinger off and shove so far up your (hey can I oh I can say it) asshole that you will shit stingers for your entire life" Jaune got so angry by the sudden appearance of the Deathstalker that his eyes once again lit on fire.

Then the fuckhead known only as the Nevermore decided to be a massive ass and swoop in Blake meanwhile had to convinced them not to get involved Yang, and Pyyrha in particular didn't fully understand why but decided you know maybe let's not get involve and let's see what happened (hint whats left of the area disappears,) Yeah Blake was correct Jaune had ripped the Nevermore's beak off and stabbed the Deathstalker with it and he practically did the ripped off the stinger and stabbed it through the Nevermore's entire upper body "Uh there we go" "Hey guys what are you looking at" Jaune looked confused because everyone except Blake and Nora was cautious of the man who single-handily killed two Grimm with his bare hands with his spear being used to chop off the Nevermore's head. Anyway the others got there pieces and Weiss hoped that he wasn't on her team.

Finally this is my biggest chapter yet to write but hey I hoped you enjoy and by the way Ozpin in the next chapter will be smashed off his head. So yeah I will get started on the next part of The Arc of The VSA but I promise that this story is not over this story is just beginning and um if your thinking about him I can say that the narrator is alright. He's just afraid of baloney now but don't worry he will be fine and he will continue being a dick to our main cast. Until next time bye bye.


End file.
